Sicstories

There’s a venn diagram that feels extremely real; queerness, mental health issues, social/economic duress, and kink fixations. Every day I see people in our circles fighting with both internal and external stressors and it’s a roller coaster to say the least. Mutual Aid is passed on with incredible generosity. I was the recipient of such generosity too, so much so that it helped me afford a vehicle and hold down a job. I will never forget everyone’s kindness.

I believe the root of the matter is there’s a certain insolubility between our personas as creators of smut and our essential humanity. In order to get our work out, we need to put it on social media, which reduces our efforts down to numbers and momentary bursts of attention from others. Even popular artists don’t feel salved by their numbers in many cases, and many feel alienated. But at the same time, is it possible to find solidarity with others off of the basis of ‘we like the same fetish art’?

I believe so, but with the major caveat that this rapport needs to be built independently of our popularity as creators. It requires the hard work of reaching out to individual people, taking the first step, and getting to know others on a personal level. This being the internet, you’ll also have to suffer these relationships not always working out in a positive way. People drift apart or find differences of opinion that pull themselves away from each other.

Is there a simple solution? No, but communicating your pain and taking the time to reach out to others on a personal level, and meaning that personal connection, is the first step for certain. Learning to endure failed relationships is another step as well. With effort, true friendships can be made and solidarity can be built, and that is where the true ‘community’ can exist in this sphere.